Every day, I open my phone and go to the “Timehop” app. It has been something I find cathartic and allows me to relive some memories via photos or videos. This morning, when I looked through today’s memories, I found myself thinking of some videos I took a while back for a bunch of stories I did for The Cradle Coach’s Instagram page.

It got me thinking – we, as sleep consultants, are in the business of routines and schedules and consistency. I preach that daily to my clients. But, at the end of the day, what does that mean? Where are those memories supposed to happen? In fact, I am often asked by my clients, “what happens if we have plans at that time or if we want to plan a vacation?”

I hate to sound cliche, but these overused phrases were all too real for me…My life was flipped upside down, shattered, and basically ripped away from me on March 8, 2019. My 36-year-old husband was killed. I was texting with him one minute, and the next minute he was gone.

At the time, my daughters were 5 and 2.5. I was left with getting them fed, bathed, and to bed that night, all while knowing (but still waiting for confirmation) that my nightmare was, in fact, my reality…and that it would be theirs, too.

Today, my daughters and I are left with memories. Memories of times together when we did stay out a bit later than normal. Memories of times that we spent together on vacations. Memories of times when we thought we had just that…more time.

As we are currently in the start of the holiday season, I felt compelled to spread a message to all of the parents who don’t ask: Go to bed late some nights, travel and make memories with your kids and family, get in the car and take that road trip even if that equates to a skipped nap! At the end of the day, we will always have our memories but, as I’ve come to realize all too sudden, we may not always have each other.

On the flip side of that, I am so grateful for the routine and consistencies my husband and I worked so hard to instill in our children. In the days that followed our harrowing reality, my children still had “control” over things that helped them feel safe and secure – a set routine that I truly believe helped keep us afloat when our ship had sunk.

Get out there and make those memories throughout this holiday season and far beyond that. Enjoy time with your loved ones, creating or living your traditions. Keep those routines in place but know that you, 100%, absolutely should break the rules every now and then.

This was the last picture we took together (March 3, 2019). Guess what? We skipped nap time that day, and I am forever grateful for that decision. 

With Love,

Rachel Fiorello



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